Tag:Drugs

Drug-Fueled Orgies Reduce Stress, Boost Morale Says ClutchX CEO

DENVER, CO - With staff more relaxed and cooperative after using hard drugs combined with group fornication, ClutchX CEO Brendan Whitehead says that drug-fueled...

DEA Warns Marijuana Is “Gateway Drug” to Really Fucking Good Time

SPRINGFIELD, VA - Cautioning the public against the giggle-inducing effects of smoking pot, the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) warned U.S. citizens at a press...

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USDA Approves Free Range Girlfriends

WASHINGTON, DC - After numerous disturbing reports of being unnecessarily caged to one boyfriend, the USDA has finally taken...

Feminists Push Bill Excluding Hot Guys from Sexual Harassment Laws

Ordinarily known for being man-hating femsplainers, feminists are finally showing some love for men, at least the hot ones.

Drug-Fueled Orgies Reduce Stress, Boost Morale Says ClutchX CEO

DENVER, CO - With staff more relaxed and cooperative after using hard drugs combined with group fornication, ClutchX CEO...

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Breaking: Woman Terrified Guy Just Asking for Directions Secretly Hitting on Her

MADISON, WI - Breaking news from downtown today as...

Barbie Unveils Aspirational Doll Line Happy Hookers

EL SEGUNDO, CA - In an effort...
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