Feminists Push Bill Excluding Hot Guys from Sexual Harassment Laws

Feminists Push Bill Excluding Hot Guys from Sexual Harassment Laws

Ordinarily known for being man-hating femsplainers, feminists are finally showing some love for men, at least the hot ones. A feminist organization called FemSexPlus are pushing through a new sexual harassment reform bill in the California senate (SB-69) co-sponsored by Democrat Gloria Steinem. Aside from making catcalling a low-level felony, the bill specifically excludes attractive men from claims of sexual harassment.

“It’s a total myth that feminists hate men!” exclaimed the organization’s founder Lilly Rich. “We want the world to know we love men, just not the fat, ugly, bald, short, broke, uneducated, immature, boring, emasculated, beta-male gamer creeps who constantly hit on us.” Ms Rich then adds, “Being a feminist ally goes a long way too.”

The organization’s spokesperson Claire Downes stated, “The problem is more complicated than sexual harassment per se; it’s women being hit on by men whom they don’t find attractive. In those cases, the likelihood of sexual harassment increases dramatically. We’ve also seen a spate of troubling cases where handsome guys are crucified in the legal system because of false accusations all due to these out-dated laws. We’re simply attempting to reverse this problem by decriminalizing flirtatious attractive men.”

Ms Downes added, “Not to mention, there’s already a massive shortage of desirable men in the world as it is. We don’t want to create even more scarcity by tossing the hot ones in jail.”

Ms Rich flatly states that if a woman is attracted to the guy, it’s not sexual harassment. “What woman doesn’t want their tooshy squeezed by a tall, handsome stranger? If you’re into him, I wouldn’t call it harassment. It’s flirting, plain and simple. If he’s hot, why not? That’s my motto. But he better not get any ideas!”

Those against the bill note its vague, almost meaningless terminology and difficult implementation in the real world. It’s unclear what will constitute “hot” since it’s a purely subjective construct. Detractors wonder, for instance, if implementation of the law simply be based off the woman’s personal sexual taste. Ms Rich’s answer is “Yes, of course. It’s a woman’s choice.”

Both Ms Rich and Ms Downes believe the bill has a realistic chance of passing.

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3 COMMENTS

  1. Is this satire.

    Imagine if men say “only attractive young women can file harassment claim because old, fat, and ugly women should be happy to receive any male attention”.

  2. Statistically, women are far less likley to accuse and criminalize good looking men.And the ones in court get far lighter sentences.This works for both genders.The Halo effect is very pervasive in Human interactions.That is not to say that Good looking people do not get reprimanded,they do,but always with less severity.

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